Is It Worth It?

I have always been the type of person where movies, quotes, songs, things people say, ect.. have an impact on me, some more than others, weather it be good or bad, positive or negative... i take things to heart.

I just finished watching the movie 2012 and it had an impact on me... as you know my husband is away right now in iraq, it has been nothing short of difficult.. difficult being and understatement.. i have stayed up countless nights crying myself to sleep by the sadness of him being gone, waking up thinking i could look over and see him, cry tears when the phone rings and my daughter runs to the phone and says "hello daddy?!" and knowing he isn't there like she wants him to be. 

Watching that movie brought out the fact that we take our lives for granted, we worry so much about ourselves, our money, our struggles, our hate, our dislikes ect... We should be spending time with our daughters, sons, husbands wives, parents, ect... we should be enjoying the outdoors, making the best out of what we have because quite frankly we have it good, and i feel happy and content with all that i have, i dont need to be a millionaire or a celebrity in hollywood, i dont need a fancy car or diamond earrings. All I NEED is my family.

I realized all the bad habits i have that i dont want my children seeing and doing themselves, i want to be an example to them... THE BEST EXAMPLE! 

I know i'm not perfect and probably never will be... but that wont stop me from always trying to be!

People look at the things i wear, the things i do or the way i live and say "she's not trying, she doesnt really want to do good..." but i am, i do... and I WILL

I understand i need to change some things in my life and i am making the baby steps to do so, things dont happen suddenly but my word means NOTHING unless i am showing the effort and know in my heart i am truly trying. 

ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS!  for instance you could be a smoker and say "yes i will quit smoking" but have you tried? have you sought help when you realized you couldnt do it alone? have you done all you can to follow through with your word?...... or are you just lying..

I know every one of us wants to be better, but were stuck. so i urge you to find something you know you want to change and take those steps you need to accomplish your goal. after all, it is a new year and you only live once... dont waste it on what the world tells you is important, listen to your heart. We are all in this together, and TOGETHER we can make a difference.. one small step at a time :)

"cause when push comes to shove, you taste what your made of. you might bend till you break, cause it's all you can take. on your knee's you look up and say you've had enough, you get mad you get strong, wipe your hands shake it off, then you STAND"

I love you giovanni, we can't wait for you to come home!

Typed with much love and cheering you on to becoming the best version of yourself, remember that everyday the sun rises... making it possible for us to live another day lets not waste it,  Sierra